Hidely Ho Neighbour!

Ok. It’s been way too long and I gotta update this thing. Here goes. Some of this will make sense to all of you. Some it will only make sense to some of you. Some of it won’t even make any sense to me. Go.

Tech. Junk.
I’ve got this new layout for the site. I’d like to say it will be the last but I can’t. I’ve always got to keep up with the cyberjoneses. I do have my new Flickr account with random photo generator in the side bar here that will update with new pics as they’re posted to my Flickr page. So peep that. You can click on the photos or the Flickr link. You can comment on my photos on that page as well. Make sure to tell me how hot I am or how cute my kids are. If you want, mention how North looks so svelte, he really appreciates that as he’s been on a bit of a diet and is having some self-image ‘issues’.

Un-tech.
With regards to the above note, you’ll have to be patient. I’ve only recently acquired internet access at home and am now SHUFFLING down the informationsuperhighway via DIAL UP. Photos tend to take just under an ETERNITY to upload. Just to give you an idea, I posted this blog entry last year, and you’re only reading it right now. I did. Honest.

The Cough Lottery
And the winner this week: Emma. We had gone almost a week without any coughing form any family members, particularly through the night, but the uninterruped sleep could only last for so long and Emma drew the short straw. She’s been coughing bad for the past week, though it’s now improving as we’ve got her on asthma meds. It would appear that we have just about every trigger possible for asthmatics – wood stove, cats, dogs, cold, firewood stored in the house. We even had a natural Christmas tree which I guess is a huge bozo no-no for asthma sufferers. Spores you know. Oh well. I guess next year the kids will just have to stay in the garage during the holiday season.

“We just call ’em Jr.
Lyn’s pregnancy is moving along well. We go in 3 days for another ultrasound and I think at that point we may find out what it is. Lyn thinks it’s a Chevy, but I’ve always been partial to imports and am really pulling for another Subaru. They just do SO f’ing well in the snow.

We’re chillin’.
The past few days here have seen record cold in this part of the world. -30 celsius which is -22 F (or 243.15 kelvin) to you yankees. It’s been butt cold, but until last week with only sprinklings of snow. Before that, temps were unseasonably high, with all sorts of strange things occuring as evidence. Bears were waking from hibernation. A guy on the news was catching jars full of grashoppers (slow day for news I guess). Apparently the viruses and bacterias that are normaly dozing away under the frost this time of year were having a hey day as well possibly contributing to everyone being sick on and off. Come to find out the whole REGION has been sick with the hospital being closed to visitors half the time due to outbreaks of one kind or another. Anyone who doesn’t buy global warming or ‘climate change’ – whichever term you prefer – needs to turn off the xbox (or at least pause your game) long enough to catch a news channel and see that the world is going to hell in a hand basket weather-wise. Wake up people. Stop driving your cars so damn much. Do something about companies that pollute the air. Get a new President…..whoops. I think I’m digressing. I think this section was supposed to be about the weather here. Well, we got 30cm (that’s X11.8 inches for you southerners. Man, this is getting lame, I’m gonna have to include some sort of converter on the site in the next upgrade) of snow today, so maybe things can get back to normal – I mean all the rednecks out here are just itching to polish off a two-four and hit the trails on their sleds…(that’s a snowmobile in canada-speak).

All about the benjamins.
I’m in the process of going live with my freelance op, buKitco, soon. Keep checking here for updates including a site with portfolio samples and other junk. If you’ve got work you want done drop me a line. We’re already open for business. You know the deal. I’m a graphic designer. If the money’s right I’ll empty your dishwasher too.

To cool for school.
I was fortunate enough to attend a cool web conference on ‘Killer Content’ recently put on by this superhero content manager guy and that is – in part – responsible for the semi-redesign/rethink of my own site. Bottom line, less is more. Give the Customer what they want. Maximizing your investment and ROI in the new world order. Providing new world strategic solutions for the new millenium into tomorrow’s today. Whoah. Sorry, I got caught up in some CorporateSpeak® there. Basically it was a good time and a huge eye opener for me, so it was really excellent. Even cooler was that I was a special guest of my connection over at Red Hot Learning so I was able to skip out on the check. Thanks Gary. I was a little bummed I didn’t get to go ‘pinting’ with the presenter, Gerry. He’s Irish. Irish people are fun. I learned that from my other Irish friend Gary. He’s having his bachelor party in a few months in NYC. I won’t be attending as I can’t get away (it’s the week of my kids’ birthdays), but it’s just as well, ’cause I hear it’s tough finding a good bail bondsman in that town. What’s this info doing in this little segment? Well you just learned a thing about NYC didn’t you? That’s educational. And you learned that Irish people are fun. Apparently they are also the keepers of all the ‘Killer Content’ secrets as well. Damn. Lucky Charms®… Killer Content… What else are they hiding over there? Is there a ‘U3’ we don’t know about yet?

Cyber-groveling. Fundraising. You say tomato…
I swear, I’m going to do eveything in my power to have one of these by next winter. All you would be gift buyers take note (Santa, your work ain’t done yet): Why spend time/money traipsing around to get me the perfect gift? That’s time you could be doing other stuff. Your nails. Perhaps viewing your favorite reality show. Scheduling and receiving that root canal you need. Think as well of the expense to the planet you incur with your fume spewing vehicle as you fight the masses to get to the local enormo-mall only to find out that they don’t sell my size snowflake sweater there (size ‘BL’ – ‘Beer-Laiden). Now you can shop from the comfort of your own home by simply donating to the Pugsley Fund. As you can imagine these things ain’t cheap and your donation can help a semi-middle class aging hipster towards his dream of total bike-geekness….operators are standing by…..

Waffling.
Over Christmas, in a somewhat ‘altered’ state (I was filled with yultide joy) I spewed forth a little piece about my lifelong association with/respect of Neil Peart with full intention of publishing it here. At that time I had no internet access and thanks be to the Gods of Cygnus X-1 for that ’cause it makes me sound like a total fan-boy. Upon re-reading after sleeping off my ‘joyover’ – it has been temporarily shelved until I can learn to articulate myself at a level higher than a 14 year old geek. What I need is mold myself into a ‘New World Man’. Get my ‘Hemispheres’ together, firing on all cylinders. You know, maybe I should take a spin in the ‘Red Barchetta’ down to ‘Rivendell’. That Barchetta, it’s got ‘Power Windows’ ya’know, and boy can it move. ‘Entre Nous’ I really just like to chill by the ‘Mystic River’ with a beer like a regular ol’ ‘Working Man’. Oh, I’m such a loser. I need help. I have such issues.

“He’s just a guy like you and me.” Lyn says. She quite obviously doesn’t get it.
“Yea, that’s like telling our kids that ‘Curious George is just a monkey'” I retort.

Oh Jesus, did I just call Neil Peart a monkey?

WAIT! NO NO NO! WHAT I MEANT WAS….AGHHHHHH!

Sigh.

If you need me, I’ll be in my room doing my homework, listening to records.

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