Takin’ you to school.

In order to keep my government grant money, I have to from time to time perform public services through the venue of this blog.

As such, here’s some information that you should know that was emailed to me by a friend:

Manure: In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship and it was also before commercial fertilizer’s invention, so large shipments of manure were common.

It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a byproduct is methane gas. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen.

Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM!

Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined just what was happening

After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term ‘Ship High In Transit’ on them, which meant for the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane.

Thus evolved the term ‘S.H.I.T’ (Ship High In Transit) which has come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.

Consider yourself schooled. Where’s my check?

Update: FYI, the same friend sent this link later. Woe is me. Who can I trust? Once again it’s readily apparent that my friends have way too much time on their hands.

Open: Season.

It’s warming up here. Snap. We BBQ’d yesterday. We’ve actually BBQ’d all winter (I’ve stood out there in snow AND freezing rain on several occassions, it’s called EXTREME BBQing…look for it on ESPN2) but yesterday was the first nice sunny day in awhile. Had only a long sleeve t-shirt on and temps were in the 15-20 degree range. Nice.

Got out for my first ride on the bike yesterday since October. Eeeesh.

Ah, Spring. Dammit.

Last friday was Emma’s 5th birthday. We had a party at the local bowling/rec/gymnastic/arcade center (doesn’t everyone have one of those?) where they have a huge indoor playclimber (like the one’s at McDonalds, only huger) and all her little squealing girlie friends from school came. It was a lot of fun.

This morning I woke up and after the usual morning routine went out to wait at the end of the drive way with Julia for the bus. Only we couldn’t get out the front door. The 2 1/2 feet of snow and ice on my roof had slid off the roof during the night and blocked both the front door and the garage door.

I don’t know if you know much about snow, but when it falls from that height, it packs pretty solid. We ended up climbing out through the garage over the avalanche which I then spent 45 minutes clearing from the front of the garage before work. I waited to clear the front door ’till I got home tonite. As I was out doing that, I heard a clunk noise from the garage.

In my garage I used to have a wood stove that I had to bring into my basement for insurance reasons. That’s a whole ‘nother fucking story. The chimney for the stove is still in the garage and I noticed it was a bit off kilter. I realized that the weight of the snow on the roof was pushing down the slope of the roof against the metal chimney and it was leaning over. If I’m lucky the snow will melt (it’s raining tomorrow) before it pushes the chimney right over and rips a large hole in my garage roof. Luck be a lady tonite.

Then there’s the wild dogs.

We’ve seen a tremendous boom in our deer population this year. We regularly get 5 or 6 walking right through the back yard each day and they come right up to the house. If you sit still inside it’s like being in a zoo, only there’s only deer, and Colin is drooling on you.

The deer are having a bit of a hard go, as with so much snow theres a. not much chow, and b. it’s hard for them to get around.

About two months back, Lyn was outside with the kids, enjoying the snow when she heard a weird noise and North was suddenly a bit spooked. She looked up the road and saw 2 German Sheperds taking down a deer. Yeah. you read that right.

Her first impulse was to yell, “HEY! Cut it out!” Then one of ’em let go of the hindquarters of the deer and looked at her and she fully realized just what the fuck was going down. The kids were there too. She freaked out and got everyone inside and called the Forest Service. Apparently there’d been lots of complaints/sightings elsewhere and after talking to several neighboors, they, too, had seen similar sights. The Forest Rangers came out, but they admitted that unless they actually get there when the dogs are there, it’s really hard to track ’em down, especially in this kind of snow, but they were doing the best they could.

Today they were out again as a neighbor walking by had noticed that in a forest clearing about 100 yards down the road from our house there was 4 or 5 half chewed deer carcasses. Yeah. Nice.

Obviously these dogs are not native to this part of town. Some back country moron has seen fit to forget about his dogs or better yet, just cut ’em loose intentionally. Now, my kids can’t go out in the yard – and it’s sketchy even with an adult and I’m hesitant to let my dog out either.

I swear if I had my way, whoever cut these dogs loose would be slathered in bacon grease and penned in with ’em. Un. Fucking. Real.

Really, this is only the tip of the iceberg. I gotta be honest, between normal work (which could not be freakin’ busier if workweeks were 7 days long), the kids, taxes, tons of freelance, snow, wild dogs and birthday parties, I’ve got so much going on my head is spinning. We had a crack in our foundation fixed last week, Julia’s birthday party is next week (Emma’s was last Saturday and a friend had one Sunday.) and I think another friend has one this Sunday. It may not seem like much, but when you’ve got to pack the 3 kids and their associated gear/food rations into the car and trek to the birthday site and back, you’re looking at a 4-5 hour chunk out of the middle of your day. One each day on the weekend and you’re pretty much hosed, cause when you get home you have to watch the kids ’cause your pregnant wife is about to pass out from fatigue.

Oh yeah, I forgot, I’m not sure if all you knew that or not, but we’ve got another one coming, ETA Sept. 2008. I dunno what I was thinking there.

Somewhere in there, I got a guitar that I’m trying to teach myself to play and then there’s a bike I’ve been building for over two years I think. I’ve gotten all the way to building the front wheel so far. I’ve moved the tools and parts into my basement now thinking I might get it done there sooner. Hopefully I can get it done before Spring (well, it’s spring now on the calendar, but REAL Spring isn’t for a month at least – it’s snowing again today for crying out loud).

Well. I’m sure it sounds like I’m griping – and really – I am. that’s what 4-5 hours of sleep a night does to a person. If you want sunshine and rainbows go read the Hallmark blog – at least I’ve posted something. Truth be told, there’s at least 7 other things I should be doing right now, none of them even remotely entertaining or spiritually fulfilling.