Drool rules.

Well hello there. Welcome to my lair on the web. I’m Julia Fackenthall, daughter of Kent and Lyn. Dad calls me ‘Bean’, short for Jellybean. I sure hope he doesn’t keep that up when I have my friends over. They weren’t going to give me a web page at first, saying that I would have a problem with spelling the big words, but if you’ve been following my dad’s web page pursuits over the years, you’ll realize he’s no Miriam Webster either. Once I pointed this out, their defenses were penetrated and I won. It might have also had something to do with the screaming and hollering I did.

Needless to say, here I am. I’m pushing 4 months old now, and let me tell you, I’ve seen some things in my day. I’ll tell you one thing, nobody looks right at 3 in the morning.

These days I spend most of my time sleeping. Or eating. Or hollering to be put to sleep or eat. Actually I spend most of my time looking around, just staring at stuff. Mom and Dad got me some toys, a set of chewable keys (as if keys are really chewable, duh), a squishy ‘8’ shaped thing I can chew on, some Winnie the Pooh (whoever he is) stuffed animals that taste pretty good, and some plastic linking fish that I’m not sure will survive if they keep them out of water much longer. They also got me this sort of kicker thing which is pretty cool, it spins and makes noise and stuff when I look at it, only problem is, when I start to doze off and bump the thing, it scares the daylights out of me. I try to tell them this and they just ask me why I’m hollering. I’m like, I am hollering cause the thing freaked me out! I’d swear, if I didn’t know better, I’d think all they heard was holler holler holler.

Mom and Dad are always trying to get me to look into this little grey box and make happy faces but it’s really pretty boring, so I usually just look bored or holler until they put it away and then I get happy again. They also seem to always get the box out whenever they give me a ‘bath’ which I really hate, ’cause I’m all naked and stuff and I’ve really put on the weight in the past few months… I mean the nurse was here the other day to weigh me and I checked in at 13 pounds for crying out loud! I should try some Tai-Bo.

You should have seen Mom freak out the other day. She had just given me one of them ‘bath’ things and had me sitting on my belly on the table. As usual, the stupid grey box was out. I picked myself up on my two arms and she just about lost it. I was only trying to see out the window over the dog’s huge fat head, and you’d think I was performing miracles or something. Needless to say, I’ve got them pegged. Whenever I want to impress them now, all I do is lift my head and smille or make a noise and they freak. They are really pretty easily entertained, plus it fun to watch them scramble for the little box.

They are also very excited now because they have started me on ‘solid food’. I don’t see what’s so solid about this mush, but apparently this is what I have to look forward to. I dunno, though, I see the dumb brown dog eating some stuff that’s crunchy and I’m thinking as soon as I figure out how to move around a bit, I’ll have to help myself to some of that.

Well, I guess that’s about all for now. I don’t have much else to report and there’s some thunder brewing in my pants, so I think it’s time that I draw some attention to myself now…..HEY THESE SHORTS ARE GETTING WET!….That usually works. Check out the pictures of me contained on this page. I don’t really feel that they accurately convey the dynamic that I was trying to acheive at the time, but Mom and Dad think they are ‘cute’. Ugh. My genius is already misunderstood, and at such a young age. Bye.