Forty and One Hundred Things.

It may have to do with my recent passing of 40 years on this rock – even though I tend to not give much credence to hoopla regarding inevitable milestones – but in an effort to get my literal and proverbial House in order, and on the recommendation of semi-retired country gentleman®, Mat Trevors, I’m now reading The 100 Thing Challenge and hope to impart some measure of wisdom and inspiration from within.

I’m pretty sure that I’m already really screwing things up. Although I did manage to unload a bunch of spare bike parts collecting dust to Mat for his winter project (+1 for purging, +1 for karma), I did it in return for copious fly fishing gear. (-1 for accumulation of material goods, -1 for I don’t know when the when the hell I was thinking I will have time to fish).

Back at evens.

Do stay tuned and read along as I hope to muse about the process here.

Mat would be happy to know that I bought the ebook version.

The Freight Train that was Scott Stevens.

I was watching the Toronto-Montreal game last night on Hockey Night in Canada and even though I’m a Habs fan, I have to admit, it was kind of a snoozer. First game of the season, teams still sorting line-ups out and all. I guess if you’re a Leafs fan you can be excited about it, but it wasn’t exactly fun hockey to watch.

For me the best part of the game was Don Cherry on Coach’s Corner. Now – hold on – I know some of you can’t stand ’em, but my comment is not so much about HIM as what he was talking about. He was discussing the recent crackdown of discipline by Brendan Shanahan, the NHL’s new VP of Player Safety and bemoaning the fact that guys were not hitting as much or “missing hits on purpose” out of fear of suspension. I’m only getting to the good part though.

At this point he showed some old video of Scott Stevens – arguably one of the best open ice hitters the game has EVER seen. And was chiding Shanny with comments like “how many games would this hit get” and “what about this one Brendan?”

I’m a little disappointed Don. You should know better. Even a layman could see that the hits Shanny are suspending guys for now are NOTHING like Scotty’s hits. Stevens was a consumate hitter. He didn’t target the head. He didn’t lead with the elbow. Stevens hit you with his WHOLE BODY. You’ll see in these videos, his arms are almost always at his sides. This is indeed why his hits were always so spectacular and indeed, in some cases, more ferocious looking than many illegal hits. That was 6’0′, 200lbs of solid muscle he was throwing at you at considerable speed. Stevens had an uncanny knack for catching guys coming cross ice with their heads down.

Truly, his hits were things of beauty. He was a textbook hitter. I loved watching him play, if nothing for the sheer fact that you didn’t know when he might catch somebody lace-checking. It made my night.

I dare say, if more guys hit like Scotty, and hadn’t resorted to throwing elbows etc, Brendan would have never had to step into this job in the first place.

In defense of Hockey.

Or an open letter to hockey fans who also happen to be idiots.

I haven’t written a blog post in ages. I should have known that it would be mallet-headed cluebaggers that would bring me out again.

I’ll disclaim this right now by saying that I’m a Habs fan. But this isn’t about teams. It’s about hockey. Hockey and subset of mouth-breathing moronic fans that are ruining it for the rest of us as well as souring non-hockey fans on the sport all together.

Those of you that know me know that I’m not one of those annoying fans always gloating about wins and whining about losses. I don’t own a single piece of Habs merchanidse. I’m just as annoyed by the obnoxious fans as you are.

If you follow hockey at all, you know that the other night Zdeno Chara of the Bruins popped Max Pacioretty. He popped him pretty good. Witness the video – it’s a bit ugly for you squeamish folk.

I’m not going to bother with the debate of whether or not this was a clean hit or not. That’s not what has me infuriated. What does is the stream of block-headed punks in my Facebook and Twitter feed who since the incident have said nothing but things like:

“Canadiens are a bunch of pussies.”
“Montreal fans are all whiners.”
“Those fans don’t know what hockey is.”

I’m going to swear a lot now.

Ok, Mr. Lunkhead. Do you really fucking think that if this had happened in any other teams barn, the fans in that town would be any less upset? Are you really that fucked in the head? They’re FANS. Of course their going to be upset, you fucking tool. You would be too if your guy got jacked and I’ll tell you to your face you’re a liar if you say otherwise.

I love the physical game as much as anyone. I love the game period. I, unlike a lot of other fans, understand why fighting is in the game. I understand and appreciate the need for enforcers. This is not the issue here. This is not the arguement.

Do you think Max Pacioretty’s career is worth one or two points Boston might have gleaned from this game? Bear in mind it was the halfway through the 3rd and they were down 4-0. Is his LIFE worth the one or two points? Do you think that Zdeno Chara, if the roles were reversed, would be willing to give his career or his life for a Bruins win?

Now, I know what you’re gonna say.

“They get on the ice and they assume the risk and it’s part of the game and” – fucking save it.

I know Chara has no history of goonery and no previous suspensions. It may have very well been an accident. He was finishing his check and didn’t realize the stanchion was there. Fine.

Hockey has RULES though, asshat. Regardless of whether it was an accident or not, if you high stick someone, it’s a penalty.

You. Are. Responsible. For. Your. Stick. At. All. Times.

This is one of the first things we are taught.

Are you not responsible for your CONDUCT at all times?

The play and the puck had moved up ice. Did Chara HAVE to finish his check? Did he give any THOUGHT to the consequences? Was he AWARE of where they were on the ice?

The whole thing is terribly unfortunate for both parties. I want to believe that Chara didn’t mean to injure Pacioretty. I want to believe that win, loose or draw, he feels bad, because he fucking should. Because bottom line, it could just as easily been him on that fucking back board unconscious.

Gary Bettman, the NHL Commissioner in interviews today stated that although this is unfortunate, it is “part of the game.” Gary Bettman is a fucking tool. Gary Bettman doesn’t seem to realize that HE is responsible for what’s in the game. Not fucking EA Sports. He wants to brush this off and chalk it up to the nature of the sport. He’s taking even less responsibility for his actions than these malletheaded players. For shame, Gary. For shame. You are not a hockey fan. You’re a fucking suit.

Players who play at the level of the NHL are the best players in the world. There is absolutely no excuse for not having a full awareness of what is going on around them on the ice to the extent that they can consider their actions.

Accidental or no, not sending a clear message that players WILL ALWAYS BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE OUTCOME OF THEIR ACTIONS by suspending Chara, just opens the door for full blown meatheads like Matt Cooke or Trevor Gillies (who just got a 10 game suspension for a hit on a player that finished the game and skated the next. You do the fucking math, cause I don’t get it) to continue doing what they’re doing, and those guys are TEN TIMES worse than Chara.

This is what you short-a-chromosome meatheads who make blanket statements about players or cities or fans or teams don’t get. Non-hockey people don’t understand it. They think the sport is barbaric. This does nothing to prove otherwise. They look at it and they go “it doesn’t make sense.” That’s primarily because IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. Why would an organization continue to foster an atmosphere where  players are regularly sidelined with season-or career-ending injuries? How is THAT good for the game? How does it make sense to perpetually place players in a needlessly dangerous environment? Explain THAT to people who don’t know the game.

If the NHL doesn’t step up, throw some major weight around and FORCE players to at least THINK about the CONSEQUENCES of their actions, someone from your or mine or someone else’s team WILL end up paralyzed or dead. It’s only a matter of time.

And that will be a much sadder day than this my friend, for real fans of hockey and for you as well.